Motherhood can be such a lonely journey and we all need some sort of community to surround us. Motherhood is a sisterhood. Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines sisterhood as
the solidarity of women based on shared conditions, experiences, or concerns.
It’s an isolating season
In motherhood, we experience isolating seasons. I find myself saying things like “there isn’t time for friends right now,” and “they don’t reach out to me anymore.” If I can’t find the time to use the restroom by myself how on earth is their time to nurture a friendship?
I’ve been working hard these past few months to really steer my life into focus and one of those purposeful goals is take care of friendships. There are a few things that have kept me hanging on – {we} call them the “Friend Fix”. I say {we} because this entire post was inspired by an impromptu conversation my friend and I had last week about feeling lonely and why it’s so hard to make and keep friends. We challenged each other to think about what excuses we put up in the friend zone, why we do it and where we could add in the “Friend Fix” we all so desperately need.
Sister, here’s what I’m saying…
- Pick up the Phone!
I’ll be the first to admit I absolutely love texting. It’s easy, convenient and fast. Truth be told, it’s great for sharing funny memes, hilarious baby poop accidents or a quick hello. But you know what’s even better? Those 10 minutes you take texting back and forth will be better spent picking up the phone and calling your friend. During an isolating season, you need quality time! Take 5 or 10 minutes out of your day/week/month to say, “hey girl, give me the story on your life right now!” Can you believe it took me five years to start doing this? No really. The quality time I now put in has reaped tremendous benefits including healing moments, holding each other accountable and relieving stress. Bonus if you can throw in a Facetime every now and then.
- Join the Mom Group!
ANY group. Friends don’t just grow on trees, they grow in communities. I have found strong friendships attending my weekly prayer group, retreats, the local library children groups, dance moms, school moms, parks and at work. Whether you work or not, I’m finding more and more groups flexible in their meeting times. Find your group, find what works and grow with them.
- Make the Coffee Date!
Do you ever run into an old friend who says, “we need to 
get together sometime”? The word “sometime” in that sentence makes me CRINGE. I’ve worked hard to stop leaving people hanging when they initiate the “let’s get together” phrase. Making time for people is important because you just never know what it can lead to. I encourage you, the next time this happens, respond with dates to pick from and make it happen. Is it tough? Darn skippy, but it’s like church, it’s tough to get there early Sunday mornings but you feel so much better afterwards. Can I get an Amen?
- Listen to the Podcast!
I started listening to podcasts a lot this year as I was on a journey to figure out the cause of my anxiety. Finding ways to lift myself up was crucial and I found my drive time to be the prime time for me to listen in. Filling up my tank with so much goodness lead me to share the golden nuggets I picked up along the way. I realized a few people I knew were also podcast obsessed and we began feeding each other knowledge on entrepreneurship, health and business-related topics. This has allowed me to flourish in many ways as a mother, a leader and a friend.
- Avoid Social Media!
Just because you follow Sally on Facebook doesn’t mean you’re really friends. In fact, you might feel more isolated than you already do scrolling through everyone’s highlight reel. A social media cleansing might be in your favor. Revert to number one on this list – pick up the phone!
How do you invest quality time with friends? And what holds you back?
