I am such a homebody that if I didn’t have set things on the calendar I probably would stay home every weekend night, save for the occasional date night with my husband. That’s why I really enjoy our supper club. It’s a chance to get out, get dressed up a bit, and socialize with other couples in our same stage of life.
One of the reason I think our particular supper club works so well is because we follow a set of rules my friend came up with when she first asked everyone to join a few years ago:
- At the beginning of the school year, she sends an email to everyone with the dates she set. (She takes into consideration everyone’s school calendars, etc.). People will reply back and sign up to host on a specific date. It is first come, first serve. Side note: having the dates set at the beginning of the year helps with getting babysitters!
- Each couple brings $30 to every supper club. The hosts can use that money to cover the cost of the ingredients they used to cook the meal or to pay for take out. The hosts provide all the food. In other words, it is not a potluck supper club, which I personally like because I don’t want to think abut having to bring something every time! If the host couple spends over what the $30 covers, it comes out of their pocket.
- Each couple is responsible for bringing the alcohol they want to drink. That way the alcohol tab does not fall to the hosts. Most people just bring a bottle of wine, but some of the men like to drink a particular bourbon so will bring that along.
It’s really fun to see what different couples choose to do when they host. Some supper clubs are casual with Peggy Sue’s BBQ or Pei Wei takeout, others are more formal. Personally, I like having a reason to use my fine china and sterling silver to set a pretty table.
Our supper club doesn’t do “theme” dinners as that’s just too much to think about for our particular group. (We all have young or elementary-aged children!) Although one year I did make everyone wear a tacky Christmas sweater to my holiday supper club….
Want to start a supper club? It really just takes one person to get the ball rolling!
Here are four things to do:
- Come up with tentative rules. For example, are couples going to contribute money each time or is the host couple responsible for paying for the entire night? This way people know what they are getting into before they sign up. Otherwise you may end up like my friend Beth, whose supper club somehow morphed into the host couple taking all the other couples to the finest restaurants in Dallas. Yikes!
- Determine if you want a big or small group. We have 11 couples in ours, which seems like a lot but it usually ends up that 3-4 couples can’t come. The evening always has a different vibe depending on who is there. (Also, having more couples means we don’t have to host so often!) On the other hand, my friend was in a supper club with just three other couples and loved it.
- Decide who you want to be in the supper club. If you are forming the supper club, you can choose! Or get a few friends together and let everyone ask another couple. It doesn’t have to be your best friends either. My husband and I like catching up with our friends who have children at other schools that we don’t otherwise see very often.
- Set frequency of dinners. We started out having supper club once a month and it was a bit much for our busy calendars. So now we meet about every 6-7 weeks and take a break in the summer.
Once you determine all these things, send out an email, or call, to invite people to join and give them all the details. And let the fun begin!
As a blogger who often writes about etiquette issues, I think there is something to be said for putting into practice the manners we try to instill in our children. And while I love going out to wonderful restaurants, it is also nice to relax and talk in the comfort of someone’s home.
Are you in a supper club? Tell us how yours works below!
