We love our kids and we think they are the cutest, smartest, funniest children that ever existed. We are proud parents and we can’t help it. But I think there is one thing we can agree that our kids just can’t do: tell jokes.
Kids can be their funniest when they don’t intend to be. They are hilarious when things happen accidentally or spontaneously. When they try to be funny or come up with their own jokes, it often fails. At least it does in the case of my 5 year old. When she started picking up the idea of telling jokes, it would go a little something like this:
Tell a joke, get a laugh, repeat 900 times.
— or —
Come up with a random grouping of words and then yell, “itsajoke!!” at the end to cue (forced) laughter.
It got painful after a while so we decided to help her out and provide her with some comedic material. Just like all good comedians, there is likely a behind-the-scenes team of comedy writers coming up with jokes. In this case, our daughter was Ellen Degeneres and my husband and I were her staff writers.
We had to find jokes that were simple, easy for her to remember and easy enough to ‘get’ the joke right away. Of course, some of the punch lines get butchered from time to time, but teaching her jokes has helped her get genuine giggles from a lot other friends. Here is a round-up of some of our favorite, kid-friendly jokes to share with your preschooler:
Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasn’t peeling well.
Why is 6 terrified of 7? Because 7 “8” 9.
What do you call a dinosaur that does not take a bath? A Stink-o-Saurus.
What do you call it when a dinosaur gets in a car accident? Tyrannosaurus wreck.
What do cows read with breakfast? A moooospaper.
Where do cows go on Friday night? To the moooooooovies.
What do you call cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese.
What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will Let it go.
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowtain.
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? Please don’t cry. It’s only a joke.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting c.. MOO!!!
(Can be used with any animal. Just interrupt the other person with the corresponding animal noise!)
Knock, knock. Who’s There? Who. Who Who? Is there an owl in there?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cows say. Cows say who? No silly, cows say moo!
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Do your kids like to tell jokes? We would love to hear some of their favorites in the comments section!
