Dallas is going through one of the worst cold and flu seasons I can remember. Almost everyone I know has been hit by it this year, even yours truly. If given the choice, I’d much rather be sick than have my kids get sick. And I definitely prefer getting sick than nursing my husband back from his deathbed.*
While down with the flu this season – I took note of the many stages of a mom being sick. And here’s what I noticed through my cloudy head/Dayquil infused, foggy mom brain.
Stage 1 – The Sniffles
The first stage of a mom being sick usually consists of sniffles, stuffy nose, slight headache, or maybe feeling a little bit queasy. It’s not always the same, but it’s always the first hint that you are not 100%. Most moms just ignore this stage all together. The show must go on, the kids must still be fed, dishes still need to be washed. Maybe I can will this sickness away!
Stage 2 – Power Through
As you start to feel worse and worse, your resolve only hardens. Must. Power. Through. becomes your mantra. Thoughts like “I’ve been more sick than this, this is nothing” and “this doesn’t even compare to labor pains” run through your fevered head. You sit down to rest for a few minutes, but the kids need something and your husband can’t find his keys – so you drag yourself up and back to business as usual. Or almost usual, because you’re walking a bit slower and wishing you were back on the couch.
Stage 3 – Take ALL the Medicines
In a desperate attempt to nip this in the bud, you start taking anything and everything. Excedrin – check. Elderberry – check. Oscillococcinum – check. Dayquil – check. Pepto – check. Colloidal Silver – check. Every essential oil known to man – check check check. Somethings gotta work and I didn’t sit through 48 hours of that essential oil seminar for nothing!
Stage 4 – Desperately Try (but Fail) to Sleep
At some point your body can just take no more, so you put the TV on, give the kids their iPads, set food out, put the baby down for a nap, try to dot all the i’s and cross all the t’s so you can close your eyes for 15 minutes. Except, that’s usually the exact moment when the UPS guy knocks on the door, or your mom calls, or the kids start fighting, or a plane lands in your front lawn. Basically anything to prevent you from getting the rest your body needs to start feeling better. If you’re lucky, you’ll get a full 3 minutes of sleep before that happens.
Stage 5 – Hubby Comes to the Rescue
Eventually your sweet husband gets home from work and sends you off to bed (or maybe the Dr) while he handles dinner and bedtime. It’ll probably be pizza delivery and the kids will forget to brush their teeth. But everyone will survive and you will pass out before your head hits the pillow. Only to wake the next day and head straight back to stage 2, pretending you’re not as sick as you really are.
Stage 6 – The Will to Live
Not soon enough, you will start to feel better. You may barely notice when this happens though, because you’ve been pretending to be fine since you first started sniffling anyway. But you will go ahead and let hubby handle dinner and bedtime 1 extra time, just for good measure.
So stock up on that Elderberry and Colloidal Silver now, make sure you’ve got some Lysol spray on hand… and may the odds be ever in your favor this and every cold and flu season.
*Stages of a Dad Being Sick
All Stages – ALMOST DEAD
