Christmas carols, twinkling lights, the smell of a fresh pie just out of the oven…the thought of it gives me hives. I love Christmas. I love Thanksgiving. Nothing makes me happier than groups of people eating good food and laughing together. But everything that we as moms have to do to “make Christmas happen” I. Am. Over. It.
So this year, I have decided that I am tired of “making it through the holidays.” But I don’t have the ability to change culture, family expectations, pressure to have a perfectly decorated house, or the budget within which I must make all of this happen. What I do have control over is myself and how I approach this season. So here are 3 ways to I’m changing my thinking to manage my holiday stress.
Limit the season. I will not accept holiday stress before it is needed. Stores may have gone full North Pole on November 1st, but that does not mean that I have to care yet. I will start thinking about Christmas the week-ish of Thanksgiving and not a minute before. My children can not handle a Christmas buildup that lasts for almost two months, and neither can I. This may mean that I miss the occasional deal or sold out something, but that is a trade off that I think is worth it so that we aren’t all sick of Christmas by December 15th.
Make a list. Right before your Christmas season starts, sit down alone with a cup of holiday beverage of your choosing and make a list. Write down the 5 things that are most important to you this Christmas. The 5 things that when you look back on Christmas 2018, you want to have in your memories. Maybe your five are watching your child open that thing they have been talking about for months, going to see the Nutcracker, making your grandmothers Christmas cookies, a Christmas movie night with your family and getting a great family photo to send out in a Christmas card. Great! Then you have your template for how to make the best holiday season for you and your family. Put your limited time and resources in to making those 5 things happen. And shrug off the stress of anything else.
Readjust your expectations of others. If I read one more article encouraging grandparents to give museum/zoo memberships instead of gifts, I am going to lose it. I am happy for all of you who live in that world, but where I live, loving wonderful aunts, uncles and grandparents want to see the children they love open a giant insane plastic monstrosity of a toy. And if one of your best memories of childhood wasn’t opening dumb toys that you were in love with, then that stinks for you. Give the grandparents this win, give your kids this memory, and then if it is forgotten in the corner of the playroom by January, give it to the Goodwill.
I don’t care about having a perfect holiday season for my kids to remember. Because it is impossible. I am neither Superwoman nor Santa Claus. What I care about is creating a “legacy of childhood Christmases” that sparkles with twinkle lights in a warm loving home, making food together, seeing family and friends, playing with their new toys in their pajamas, and as an adult, when all their Christmases blur together, that they will remember all of that as magical. It is all I can hope for, and I think it is within our reach.
